4.
The most painful, the most morbid and terrifying
experience imaginable
comes by grace of alcohol.
And any walking stiff who wants it can get it.
It opens door after door.
It's an authentic path to knowledge, perhaps the most
human of all, though perilous in extremis.
And it shows itself to be so appalling, so inimical, its
journey of rue and anguish,
that most would choose to stay on in death.
For any return from the other side of the night is sheer
miracle.
And only the chosen accomplish it.
On your return, the world glares at you with malevolent
eyes:
you are a stranger, an interloper, and you feel down to your
bones how the world abhors your gaze;
what it wants is for you to wane and disappear--what it
wants is your absence.